In the Geek World I Just Might Be Court Jester

I can remember in high school, nearly a quarter century ago (oh my goodness /facepalm).  In that dark age region of time, I was often referred to as a geek.  My wife defined geek in a way for me that just made me laugh so hard that I just had to share.  She said: “A geek is a nerd that has friends.”  This was a response to me one day referring to myself as a nerd.  I guess I just hadn’t considered the nuance of geekdom like she had.

At any rate, I am a special classification of geek these days.  I am a computer geek, but just barely.  I am not a hacker or a coder, or anything of the sort.  I am a technology geek.  It makes my wife’s eyes roll when I start looking at technology.  Shoot, it can be very pathetic at times even from my point of view.  I love the bleeding edge of tech, and if my computer starts to lag, I am constantly scanning the online tech stores for something newer and faster and “cooler” than what I have now.

I thought I would share a  list of “symptoms” of the computer geek so you can benchmark your own personal geek level too.

  • You’d rather communicate with people via e-mail, text messaging, instant message, or Twitter, then face to face, because “it’s just easier that way.”
  • 16GB (or 32GB, or 64GB, or well you get the idea) flash drive “just doesn’t hold enough.”
  • You say phrases like “Make it so!” and “These aren’t the droids you’re looking for”, when you talk to people.
  • You write “text” in blocks of “140 Characters.”
  • You have an LCD monitor 20″ or greater, or a multiple monitor setup. (for the record my monitor is 24″)
  • You have more friends in the ‘virtual world’ than in real life!
  • You wear T-shirts with Star Wars, Star Trek or any computer-related visuals on them
  • You have a junkyard full of extra computer parts in your garage.
  • You built your own PC and giggle when people tell you they have a Dell or HP computer.
  • Your PC has 4GB of RAM OR MORE…
  • You carry a USB flash drive in your pocket regardless of where you go.
  • When you’re bored you take apart your desktop, laptop, television, DVD, DVR or cable box for fun.
  • Friends, family and family friends’ friends, call you asking for computer help.
  • You have a cable internet connection but would like a T-1 line (or a T-3 or fiber) if  it was reasonably affordable.
  • Red Bulls and frozen dinners are a daily part of your diet.
  • When you yell at your radio whenever a “Computer Show” airs because you think the host is an idiot…
  • You listen to the idiot anyway…
  • World of Warcraft is constantly on your to-do list.
  • You have four (or more) computers at your house, and it “just isn’t enough.” (We have 4 working, and two dead ones here)
  • No matter how fast your computer turns on, it still isn’t “fast enough”… even if it is just waking up from a sleep mode.
  • You passionately argue the virtues of (pick ’em): Windows vs. Apple vs. Linux / ATI vs. NVIDIA / AMD vs. Intel / LCD vs. Plasma / Star Wars vs. Star Trek vs. / Comics vs. Graphic Novels / HD-DVD vs. Blu-Ray / USB vs. FireWire / Jobs vs. Gates / etc. etc…
  • You loathe people who buy iPods, iPhones, or iPads just because they are the hip things to own.
  • You secretly covet having an iPod, iPhone, or iPad – but are too embarrassed to own one because of what your geek friends would think.
  • Your family calls you to fix their computers… so do your non-geek friends (or friend)…  so do strangers…
  • You have major farmer’s tan! (guilty)
  • You own five or more useless gadgets that run off your USB ports.
  • You’ve gotten this far READING THIS LIST!

About Mike Lemons
I'm a guy in his 40's who has been bumming around the net for years. I am married to a wonderful woman, and have 3 gorgeous kids.

5 Responses to In the Geek World I Just Might Be Court Jester

  1. Chatmay says:

    A rogue I play WOW with says he wishes they would make voice commands where he can yell SAP at his computer.
    Even more geeky, I have a WOW Blog! My mom thinks I’m nuts.

  2. vakkermom says:

    A true computer geek wouldn’t have a farmer’s tan…he/she wouldn’t have a tan at all. When would they leave their “cave?”

  3. jamieonline says:

    I’ll admit that PCs just DON’T turn on fast enough, the iPhone, iPad and iEverthing else is just brilliant – how did I live without it and my USB is with me rather a lot….. That’s about as geeky as I get. Compared to most friends and colleagues I use the PC way more than them – I’m certainly not one to solve the techno issues though…. I’m lost there.

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